Mystic 5 supports South Cotabato Tambayan in 2011 Philippine Blog Awards

South Cotabato Tambayan the only webpage in the world wide web dedicated to the people of South Cotabato is my choice for the Blogger's Choice in the 2011 Philippine Blog Awards.

For two years now, South Cotabato Tambayan has effectively connected South Cotabate├▒os all over the world. Anyone from South Cotabato can share and post his/her photos, videos, share stories on blogs, discuss issues in the forum, and chat. The timely news and informations posted on blogs keeps me and everyone else updated. More power South Cotabato Tambayan.

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Post bday note: 17 RULES TO LIVE BY

 . . . by nature she is strict. she knows that. 

. . . strict in implementing office orders like in wearing office uniform, attendance to flag ceremony, issuance of trip tickets, approval of disbursement vouchers, procurement of office supplies, monitoring of employees' performance and more . . . 

she always see to it that we accomplish our daily task, that we reach our targets, that we prepare all the reports and submit them on time.

she keeps on checking if we are indeed working seriously from 8 in the morning til 5 in the afternoon. That simply give us no chance to browse fun pages and chat with friends on the  web.

but you know what? behind all that is a Spongebob! . . . you know why? everytime am bored or tensed or bothered or wanna talk a lot, i can just come and see her for a chat. . . for a munch of her all time favorite boy bawang, chocolates and other knick knacks. she cares for that.

sometimes, her room is like an extension of my bedroom. . . i can just lie down on her hypo allergenic pillows or hug her big and cozy hot dog. 

her patience in dealing with her aging mom made her more endearing. i have witnessed how she goes into the detail of attending to the latter's daily hygene, medicines, meals, recreation and other personal needs. she does it all without any yaya to do the errand.

being the Boss of the Management Services Division taking charge of all the nitty gritty of the entire office financial  concerns including cash, budget, human resource management, general services, personnels' training and more, tis not easy to be at the same time full time daughter to an aging mom. 

just imagine the bulk of job and personal matters to attend to 24 hours a day seven days a week. huh! good thing, she is single!

Og Mandino's book she has given on my 40th birthday sealed the next level of our friendship. the following lessons are what she meant to teach as i take the next step to maturity.

Ma'am Merlie, thank you so much. am sharing what you had been telling me:

From A Better Way to Live BY: OG MANDINO

1. Count your blessings. 
Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play and you will finally be able to move forward toward the life that God intended for you...with grace, strength, courage and confidence.

2. Today, and every day, deliver more than you are getting paid to do. 
The victory of success will behalf won when you learn the secret of putting out more than is expected in all that you do. Make yourself so valuable in your work that eventually you will become indispensable. Exercise your privilege to go the extra miles, and enjoy all the rewards you receive. You deserve them!

3. Whenever you make a mistake or get knocked down by life, don't look back at it too long
Mistakes are life's way of teaching you. Your capacity for occasional blunders is inseparable from your capacity to reach your goals. No one wins them all, and your failures, when they happen, are just part of your growth. Shake off your blunders. How will you know your limits without an occasional failure? Never quit. Your turn will come.

4. Always reward your long hours of labor and toil in the very best way, surrounded by your family.
Nurture their love carefully, remembering that your children need models, not critics, and your own progress will hasten when you constantly strive to present your best side to your children. And even if you have failed at all else in the eyes of the world, if you have a loving family, you are a success.

5. Build this day on a foundation of pleasant thoughts. 
Never fret at any imperfections that you fear may impede your progress. Remind yourself, as often as necessary, that you are a creature of God and
have the power to achieve any dream by lifting up your thoughts. You can fly when you decide that you can. Never consider defeat again. Let the vision in your heart be in your life's blueprint. Smile!

6. Let your actions always speak for you, but be forever on guard against the terrible traps of false pride and conceit that can halt your progress. 
The next time you are tempted to boast, just place your fist in a full pail of water, and when you remove it, the hole remaining will give you a correct measure of your

7. Each day is a special gift from God, and while life may not always be fair, you must never allow the pains, hurdles, and handicaps of the moment to poison your attitude and plans for yourself and your future.
You can never win when you wear the ugly cloak of self-pity, and the sour sound of whining will certainly frighten away any opportunity for success. Never again. There is a better way.

8. Never again clutter your days or nights with so many menial and unimportant things that you have no time to accept a real challenge when it comes along. 
This applies to play as well as work. A day merely survived is no cause for celebration. You are not here to fritter away your precious hours when you have the ability to accomplish so much by making a slight change in your routine. No more busywork. No more hiding from success. Leave time, leave space, to grow. Now. Now! Not tomorrow!

9. Live this day as if it will be your last. 
Remember that you will only find "tomorrow" on the calendars of fools. Forget yesterday's defeats, and ignore the problems of tomorrow. This is it. Doomsday. All you
have. Make it the best day of your year. The saddest words you can ever utter are, "If I had my life to live over again..." Take the baton, now. Run with it! This is your day!

10. Beginning today, treat everyone you meet, friend or foe, loved one or stranger, as if they were going to be dead at midnight. 
Extend to each person, no matter how trivial the contact, all the care and kindness
and understanding and love that you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same agian.

11. Laugh at yourself and at life. 
Not in the spirit of derision or whining self-pity, but as a remedy, a
miracle drug, that will ease your pain, cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective that seemingly terrible defeat of the moment. Banish tension and concern and worry with laughter at your predicaments, thus freeing your mind to think clearly toward the solution that is certain to come. Never take yourself too seriously.

12. Never neglect the little things. 
Never skimp on that extra effort, that additional few minutes, that soft word of praise or thanks, that delivery of the very best that you can do. It does not matter what others think, it is of prime importance, however, what you think about you. You can never do your best, which should always be your trademark, if you are cutting corners and shirking responsibilities. You are special. Act it. Never neglect the little things.

13. Welcome every morning with a smile. 
Look on the new day as another special gift from your Creator, another golden opportunity to complete what you were unable to finish yesterday. Be a selfstarter. Let your first hour set the theme of success and positive action that is certain to echo through your entire day. Today will never happen again. Don't waste it with a false start or no start at all. You were not born to fail.

14. You will achieve your grand dream, a day at a time, so set goals for each day-not long and difficult projects, but chores that will take you, step by step, toward your rainbow.
Write them down, if you must, but limit your list so that you won't have to drag today's undone matters into tomorrow. Remember that you cannot build your pyramid in twenty-four hours. Be patient. Never allow your day to become so cluttered that you neglect your most important goal-to do the best you can, enjoy this day and rest satisfied with
what you have accomplished.

15. Never allow anyone to rain on your parade and thus cast a pall of gloom and defeat on the entire day. 
Remember that no talent, no self-denial, no brains, no character, are required to set up in the faultfinding business. Nothing external can have any power over you unless you permit it. Your time is too precious to be sacrificed in wasted days combating the menial forces of hate, jealousy and envy. Guard your fragile life carefully. Only God can shape a flower, but any foolish child can pull it to pieces.

16. Search for the seed of good in every adversity. 
Master that principle and you will own a precious shield that will guard you well through all the darkest valleys you must traverse. Stars may be seen from the bottom of a deep well, when they cannot be discerned from the mountaintop. So will you learn things in
adversity that you would never have discovered without trouble? There is always a seed of good. Find it and prosper.

17. Realize that true happiness lies within you. 
Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
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Valentine's Day Post

Valentine's Day is over yet i still wonder why romantic love is associated with the story of Valentine . . . 

others are even taking extra mile just to look great and gorgeous. . . does it really matter? so what if you don't have a date? a guy or a girl for that matter.

Valentine's Day come and go.  so, what's the fuss?

mmmmm, am not sure with the real feeling. maybe because i dont know how it is like being ignored by the apple of one's eye. er perhaps am also trying to deny.

but what am sure is . . . i've never been a hopeless romantic. roses? chocolates? cards? notes? i had them all from different levels and stages of my life.

weekend trips abroad? a house? be famous? a brand new car? there's more actually . . . shhhh! someone had even asked me to keep his number and promised to show the world

i don't stand like a stunning ms universe but i dont understand why i got all of the above!

if others  exert a lot of effort just to catch man's attention, i dont have to. . . despite my age, others do still make a mistake. but u know what? tis not easy being attractive. believe me.

it disturbs a lot. . .

sure glad, i have learned to discern and give a second thought before giving in. i could have gone through more places for free, acquired this and that for free and have enjoyed a lot more for free.

but i prefer to have peace and contentment within me. after all, i believe, what really matter most are the things which are totally free . 

if only i have the heart to take advantage, i could have grabbed all the opportunities and woh lavish my self not only with the excitement, comfort and luxuries one could never imagine.

but tis enough that i am flattered and thrilled. . . i still believe that the best and softest pillow to sleep on is a clear conscience.

tis not a self defense nor a consolation for those who until now keep searching for their Valentine... am only sharing base on a true to life experience.

i cant help but thank people who truly care . . . those who constantly pray for me, my church and my heart teacher, Sir VALENTINE who have perfected his mission in me.

this blog is specially dedicated to him.

i may partly have an autobiographical mindset in my thought today but i am not trying to win all the arguments. i may have compared my thought but again tis not a self-defense nor a confession of others sin nor blaming others failing... just a post Valentine random thought i wanna share .

Below are the lessons from "Being Made Whole" that really taught me. the entire book leads to spiritual maturiry and mainly speaks about credibility and integrity.

. . . unless we let someone PERFECT, SINLESS and FLAWLESS take over us; we can never find peace. we can never stand tall and blameless like what the author said.

so, not only this Valentine's month, let us keep checking  if the following mental dirts and dangerous stuff still occupy the largest portion in our hearts. i do. it helps. and swear, it won't bother you to keep searching your Valentine and won't bother you to go through a lot of arduous physical make over. believe me. it's in the motive of your hearts

* autobiographical mindset - preoccupation of one’s own life - the past, present and future; haunted by success and failures and wrapped up with the idea that life itself is viewed only as personal experience

* win always mentality - constantly making sure of victory either in discussion, decision, choice, action or anything else; cannot take others to disregard his/her ideas or point of view 

* i know it all - all knowing 

* comparative/competitive thinking - constantly compares own life situation with somebody else's status, performance, etc 

* defensive mode - busy guarding his/ her own territory; sole aim is to make sure, he/ she is safe; runs away because he/she think others are finding fault in him/her

* assigning motives to others action - here we assign our own motives to somebody else's action (the author's definition that i like most) 

* confessing other's sin - equivalent to gossiping; looking down on others; spotting others differences and regarding one’s self as superior

* blaming others' weaknesses or strenghts for own failings - quick to make excuses for being unable to influence change in a situation and instead blame it on strenghts or weakness of others 

* victim mentality - endless self-pity 

* unwillingness to submit to authority - when things do not happen as expected, permeates resentment, harbors ill will and ends up in an open defiance of authority 

*poor listener - seems to be listening but immersed to own thoughts

*poor team worker - preference to work on solely and wanting to prove that "i can do better than the team" 

*fear of rejection and fear of criticism - cannot accept negative feedback
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that hearty link between mother and son

with the shocking news that captured  our attention in the country today, it is but normal to read and hear various comments from mere spectators and those directly involved.

mine is not more on the probable cause nor  motive of the incident but the saddest thing that only a son and a mother can understand... so, tragic but i hope that will never happen to my dear one. God forbid!

let my post then be a once upon a time endearing moments with my little one.

After our bedtime prayer that mundane eve of May 9, 2009, my little boy asked, “Why is your body always hot, ma?”

 “You mean, warm?”  “Yes," he said. "I love it when you hug me.” "Love it when i hug you, too. "

 “. . .yeah. like the hens, the ducks and the geese whose youngs are hatched because of their henny penny hug. maybe, the're really hot!"

 “Warm, honey,” I said. “Alright, alright. warm whatever it is.”  he said again and again.

 while busy packing up his things, he came again and asked,"Will you miss me if i'll be off for the kid's camp?"  "Of course!" i said.

 He then gave me some woodpecker smacks like he will be missing me a lot. He kissed and kissed like it was his last; on my cheeks, eyes, nose all over my face.

 That led me to ask what kind of girl he wanna have  one day and he said, “I will have someone who will love me as I am; just someone who will love me as I am. . .” 

 “Not exactly like me?”  “No, because there’s only one like you. And you are just for my dad.”

 When ask if he will miss me in case i'll be off for a week or two. He didn't say yes or no. he paused for a moment then ask what if his dad and i are no longer around. "what would life be like?" 

with my warmest hug i said "God is not selfish enough to take us away just that. One day soon,  you will have your little ones, too. upon settling down, you will be on your own; so, learn to be independent.”

 He paused again then asked, “What if, nobody will like me?” 

 “That’s impossible. there's always that special someone for every one and all of us will go through the same cycle of life. To be born, to belong, be a blessing and leave a legacy – like the Lion King.”

“. . . you mean, I must have my own family, too?”  “Of course. But …pray for your future partner.”

“But Simba and his friends didn’t pray for his partner.”

“Yes, he didn’t. You think, lions, pigs and meerkat pray? But you see? Simba had a good heart. That’s why, he got his dream partner” I explained

. “now I know what I want someday.”   “A lioness, merkaat or a piggy?”

“No. I wanna have someone like you. Please keep our secret, okey?”  I just said yes but i can’t help it.

For sure, other moms who will hear the same from their son would be proud to tell the same story again and again...
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Life and Death

. . . the last time he touched my hair for my monthly hot oil,  i have already felt something. . . i dont know. i was not really sure. but my extra sensory perception had all the answers when last early morn of December 5, Grace called me up and said, "Ma'am, si Tata . . !" 

from her voice, i can sense something morbid happened. . . and the saddest revelation was . . . Tata was crashed on a deadly vehicular mishap after the Golden Valley that fateful night of December 4. 

the moment, Grace told me that, i know it was real. but i never thought that soon. he stayed with us for nearly two years. and in those years, i have not received any report against him being one of the hairdressers except that he seldom fix  and comb his hair ... 

... i never heard him complained nor murmur against our rules. i find him to be honest, hard working, law abiding, always ready with his accomodating gestures . . 

i knew he had never been into drugs, never been into wild parties with hard wines. . . he is the silent type, a homebody whose simple joy is to accomplish his daily task with all integrity and honesty. 

i have already felt it since the day we met. that is why no matter how others tell me to release him because he is a Muslim, i cannot convince myself just because we differ in faith and religion...

besides am not the kind who always believe what others say. i am keen in discernment. i always think about the motives. thank God for the wisdom.

what melted my heart was when his friends, staying with him told me how he saved his hard earned money just to bring pancit daily, of how he saved enough for putting up his dream house - a 4m x 5m m nipa hut with cemented floor.

i saw the real condition, i saw how hard he tried... no wonder why whenever i tell him to stay a little while everytime i drop by and check them after office hour, he is always in a hurry to go home. 

twas all not because of anything else but because of his precious belonging. what made it more precious were the 3 young ones depending on him. he got no family. he had been orphaned but he got the heart to rear 3 more under his care.

i cannot imagine how this single, 24 year old lad made it... but the confessions by his angels revealed the kind of person he is... my only regret is, i have not seen him within that week before it happened. and i have not prayed with them the way we used to before salon's closing . . 
i only got a sigh when Grace said, "don't worry, Ma'am, we have fixed his hair at least one week before the accident . . . his wish to have a beautiful hair was granted" 

i've known him to be one of a kind. but i discovered  more when he left.. . may his soul rest totally in peace and all those who were already departed.

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